It comes to me almost like second nature, that I have taken it for granted that sometimes not everyone is as keen to invite people over. Just like with anything else, the more you practice doing it, the easier and more enjoyable it gets.
Keep in Mind: Hospitality ≠ Entertaining. Home is where we welcome family, friends, and neighbors into a life-giving space. Hospitality is the catalyst for making friends out of guests, making memories out of moments, and making respite out of a get-together.
I loved this article by Tamara Hill Murphy on the importance of communal gathering and the sharing of a meal.
I truly believe God created us as creatures for community. Hospitality is one of the ways we can cultivate connection with others. In order to help take the overwhelm out of overthinking, I've created this FREE printable for you to help shift your perspective and start inviting guests over!
Be Flexible- Let go of any preconceived notions of what things should look like. Remember that your location and circumstances don’t dictate the welcome you can provide. You can make space for people even in unconventional ways: Ask someone to meet for coffee, invite friends to meet up at a park, include others to join in an activity you are already doing- going on a hike, watching a game, etc.
Be Available- It goes without saying that calendars fill up quickly. Pencil in some dates of when you want to have people over (even if you haven’t invited them yet!). If you block off time, you are more likely to make things happen. You can even make a list of friends with the goal of making an invitation to them in the next _{insert time frame}_. Just go down your list and start inviting until someone accepts!
Be Vulnerable (Real)- Repeat after me: It’s okay to let people into my everyday life. Have coffee with a friend, even if your laundry pile is out. Invite a family over for dinner, even if you didn’t finish painting the room. Give yourself permission to order pizza, if you don’t feel like cooking or your oven is broken.
Be Realistic- If you feel crunched for time or overwhelmed cooking a whole meal, invite friends over for coffee and dessert. If you need to use paper plates and plastic cups, do it. Ask for help, don’t be embarrassed to ask your guests to contribute to the meal. It takes the pressure off and makes meal prep easier on everyone. You could even be honest if it’s last minute, “We would love to get together with you, but obviously we didn't plan our meal plan in advance. Would you like to “brown bag” dinner (pick up to-go) and come hang out tonight?”
Be Present- Stop thinking about your baseboards! Stop obsessing over your frizzy hair. Stop comparing your house to the online world. Just think about how you can connect and make your guests feel seen and heard (Hint: It’s not how put together you or your house looks).
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